Who’s the CEO of your household?

My sister posted about an important event in her family. She named each family member and highlighted their significant contributions, but then she downplayed her role in the event to:

“And I . . . let the toddler roam the room.”

I responded: “Please give yourself—and all primary caregivers out there—proper credit for your contribution today, and every day: You supported your toddler’s best possible development, while empowering everyone around you to do what they did.”

I’ve seen how my sister leads her family and she is definitely the CEO.

I’ve been in corporate leadership positions. And I’ve been the “stay-at-home” parent. The roles of primary caregiver, household manager, and community builder are C-level positions. (They just usually don’t get an executive admin, so they have to handle execution too.)

When a parent chooses to “stay home,” they’re choosing to do unpaid labor—and it’s actually the labor we pay the highest dollars for in the corporate world.

When 22-year-olds begin their corporate careers straight out of college, they are given very specific instructions.

They are given task lists to check off.

They are given feedback. And customized suggestions to show them where they can develop their skills.

If something goes wrong, they have people who review the process and make adjustments to the instructions.

They grow leadership capabilities step-by-step, eventually taking on more of the management responsibilities: being the one to write the instructions, create the task lists, and develop the process. Some advance to executive-level strategizing: identifying the mission, vision, and values, determining priorities, delegating responsibilities, decision-making at the highest levels.

When 22-year-olds become the primary caregiver of an infant, we all know they don’t get instructions.

They have to create their own tasks lists. And learn 17 different parenting philosophies and methods—only to then develop their own custom process for each child!

They start working at the management and executive levels immediately. And often this extends beyond their child’s development. How often do we see the primary care provider also take on the household manager and main community builder roles as well? Taking on all these roles enables their partner to spend more of their time doing work that is not only paid, but recognized as real work experience on resumes.

Caregiving is a different type of work experience, and requires a different kind of thinking: the kind that looks at the big picture, evaluating for efficiency, quality, and value. They carry the weight of full responsibility from the get-go.

This builds a unique set of skills.

• Who is the primary childcare provider in your home?

• Who manages the shopping, cleaning, and scheduling of all the appointments?

• Who deals with the dishwasher warranty and health insurance mixups?

• Who builds community around your kids, coordinates the social calendar, communicates about upcoming events?

Don’t underestimate their value.

Whether they choose to stay home, or to step into the paid workforce, it’s time we recognize what they actually bring to the table.

If you know someone who is under-compensated for the value they actually bring, consider sponsoring them for coaching.